We could never get a text message like that here, could we? After all, what would our government need to accomplish such a thing? Location data from our phones? Meta data on our subscriber numbers? Maybe a database to conveniently store all of that information?
No. Impossible. Could never happen here.
I'm so happy President Obama assured me there are no abuses in the NSA program. That it's completely legal. That there is ample oversight. Otherwise I would be worried.